11 Tips for Surviving Road Trips With Small Children

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Like most military families, we don’t live near our closest relatives. The family that is within the most reasonable distance of us is my parents, and they’re still more than 500 miles away. Which, with kids in tow, means it takes about 10 hours to drive there. Because this is a doable one-day drive (because we’re masochists), we actually go to see my parents once or twice a year, and they usually make it down to see us a couple times as well. But no matter how frequently we make the drive, traversing the distance from Tennessee to Kansas with three small kids is always a daunting task. But making so many long road trips with my kids has taught me a few tips and tricks that make the drive a little more manageable. If you’re facing a long drive to visit family (or a PCS move) this holiday season, here are 11 ideas to help make the trip more enjoyable for everyone.

1. Buy snack trays/cups with multiple compartments to hold lots of different snacks at the same time—We love the Bentgo bento boxes because they can hold 5 different snacks at the same time. I can load up the tray with new snacks at every stop, hand it to my kids, and then (hopefully) not have to pass any snacks back to them until we reach our next stop. This works best for kids 3+ years old, who you trust can hold an open tray on their lap without spilling the entire thing all over the floor. There are other snack trays on the market with lids that can be used for younger kids. The Gobe Snack Spinner is a great option, if your child is old enough to operate the button (this does take a while for them to learn; even my 4-year-old struggled with it at first). But the main point is that the more options your kid has at one time, the less likely they are to bother you about snacks during the drive.
2. Hit the road early—The best way to tackle a long day in the in car (that I have discovered) is to leave as soon as the kids wake up in the morning. Michael and I get everything loaded up the night before, then wake up before the kids to ensure that we’re ready to leave as soon as they wake up. Once they’re awake, we change diapers and do a quick potty stop, then load the kids in the car, pajamas and all. We eat breakfast on the road (muffins and applesauce pouches work great for this and can be prepared ahead of time), and the adventure of leaving so early keeps the kids in good spirits for the first couple hours of the drive without any effort on our part. Note: Lots of people advise driving at night so that your children are asleep for the majority of the ride. Personally, I do not recommend this. First of all, my kids tend to fight sleep in the car, even if it’s dark out. Their car seats are not super comfortable sleeping spaces, and they’re more likely to wake frequently, have neck and shoulder pain, and be cranky when they wake up if they sleep in the car. Also, I am a terrible night driver and passenger. When I’m the one driving, I struggle to stay awake. If I’m the one in the passenger seat, I am too exhausted to stay awake and keep my husband alert, but I’m also too stressed that he’ll fall asleep to sleep soundly. Every bump in the road, every unexpected turn, every sudden tap of the breaks wakes me enough to mumble, “are you awake?!” to my poor husband before falling back into an uncomfortable stupor. It’s not a pleasant experience for anyone, so we drive during the day, even though that means the kids will be awake.
3. Try to stop for lunch at a place with a playground—Chick-Fil-A is a favorite lunch spot for us for this very reason. Every Chick-Fil-A has an indoor playground where the kids can run off some energy while mom and dad eat and take a break. Some McDonald’s still have indoor play areas, as do a few other restaurants. But if this isn’t an option (thanks, Covid), go through the drive through somewhere and then head to a local park or the nearest rest stop. The key point is that your kiddos will have been trapped in a car for several hours at this point, and still have a good chunk of time left to go. So let them run around as much as possible at around the halfway point during the day and let off some of that pent up energy.
4. If you don’t need gas, try and stop for potty breaks at hotels—Most 3- and 4-star hotels like Holiday Inn, Hilton, or Marriott have bathrooms in their lobby with baby changing stations. They’re much cleaner and nicer than public restrooms at gas stations or fast food restaurants. And there’s usually a little green space outside that the kids can run around in for a few minutes before you get back into the car. It’s also way more comfortable to stop and nurse a baby in a hotel lobby armchair than it is in your car or a bathroom stall.
5. Allow your kids to pick out one small toy/treat at gas stations as a reward for good behavior—This works best for kids over the age of 3, since younger kids don’t really understand consequences well enough to get the concept of a reward. But reminding your kids that they’ll get to pick out a treat or toy at the next stop can be a strong motivator for good behavior, and I am definitely not above bribery when we’re going to be stuck in a small vehicle all day together.
6. Have designated “car-only” toys, so they have novelty value for your kids—We have a handful of toys that stay in the car all the time. They’re only for playing with in the car, and this helps keep them exciting on long trips. Combining your car-only toys with a handful of favorite toys, coloring books, and other activities will keep your kiddos entertained during the drive. If you’re not sure what toys make good car toys, I recommend getting a Mini Voyager Travel Kit! They’re curated for different ages from 1 to 8 and contain the perfect combination of toys and activities to keep your little ones occupied for your entire trip.
7. Have a basket in your car for shoes and socks—Long drives are way more comfortable for your kids if they’re not wearing shoes. And if your kids are anything like mine, they’ll take their shoes and socks off pretty quickly after they get in the car, whether you want them to or not. So pick your battles, and teach your kids to drop their shoes and socks in a designated basket inside the car as soon as they climb in. That way, you’re not all frantically searching for shoes and socks when you stop for your next potty break! You’ll know exactly where to find them.
8. Use a large plastic cereal container and a plastic grocery bag as a trash can for inside the car—Trash builds up fast during long road trips, so keeping a miniature trash can in the car can help manage the mess and ensure you’re not drowning in garbage every time you stop.
9. Try and schedule stops for every 1.5-2.5 hours—This will require some planning before the drive. Hop on Google Maps and find out how long the drive is between major cities. Note the places that will be good stopping spots in advance, so you know approximately how long you’ll be in the car each time. Try not to stop more frequently than every 1.5 hours. And if you have older kids, try and make each stretch 2-2.5 hours long. Obviously, when you have small babies or potty training toddlers you may have to stop more frequently, and that’s okay. But fewer stops means a shorter day overall, so try not to stop more often than necessary. Trust me on this one, knowing the best places to stop before you leave takes a lot of the “how far to the nearest rest stop” stress out of the equation, and that’s always a good thing.
10. Spend at least some of the trip interacting with your kids—Because you’ve been locked in a car with your kids all day, you’re going to feel tapped out when it comes to interacting with them. But from the point of view of a young child, they’re stuck in a car seat, unable to touch you, talk to you, and play with you the same way they usually can. It can be very isolating. So make sure to spend some time during stops running around with your kids and holding them for a little while. And while you’re on the road, sing some of their favorite songs together, tell them stories/read to them, or play games like “I Spy.” It may seem like a small thing, but that time spent with you will help them feel less trapped and alone.
11. In case all else fails, have lollipops, fruit snacks, or other treats on hand as bribery—Even a successful road trip will have its snags, so be prepared with special treats as a way to bribe good behavior out of your kids, or end tantrums that otherwise would go on indefinitely. I’ve found this to be especially helpful when you have a potty training toddler who isn’t eager to use an unfamiliar bathroom during the trip.  I don’t usually suggest giving your kids sugar as a solution to your problems, but desperate times call for desperate measures!

Phew! That’s a lot of information I just threw at you! Hopefully it makes driving for hours on end with small children seem a little less terrifying. It may be a daunting way to spend a day (or week, if you’re PCSing), but it can be done with minimal trauma for everyone involved. In fact, it can even be fun! In my experience, my kids tend to surprise me by doing so much better on the drive than I expect. But it’s equally true that no plan survives first contact with the enemy (this is a favorite phrase of my dad’s, and you’ll probably hear it here often). So have a comprehensive plan, but don’t sweat it when things don’t go exactly the way you expect. Good luck!

If you have any of your own favorite tips and tricks for traveling with little ones, let me know! Comment below with how you handle long road trips.